The Ties That Bind

So to start with i did my dialog in front of everyone with Craig critiquing last night & it went really well!! I had a line that I put in the wrong place, but it was minor. i felt really confident, I knew my shit, I was relaxed, I just kept thinking this is the exact same as it was on the podium in Elk Grove, and Craig gave me excellent feedback. Julia kicked some in too, so i felt amazing going to sleep last night.

Now, back to today, so all of visiting teacher are starting to filter in and today was our first day taking classes from non Bikram-staff people. So far the teachers have been awesome! it's so nice to see how many different styles and personalities can still show through with the same dialog. It's crazy how you can do the exact same postures, in the exact same order, with a room the exact same teperature, yet it can feel so different depending on who the teacher is. The afternoon class was a kick. The teacher was from Minnesota and she started class with some song lyrics and I knew immiediately that I would like here. THroughout class she was giving us lyrics from different artists and I loved it, because in class I always have songs floating around in my head. She had a prety good variety of Minnesota artists too, Mason Jennings, Beck, John Denver, and of course she ended Savasanah with a little Bob Dylan. (She went for Forevor Young, I'll admit, I thought she was gonna go with Blowing In The WInd) BUt it was cool because I've never spoke to this woman, never knew she existed until last night, and I felt an immiediate connection with her. That and she cracked me up in standing head to knee when she told us "Lock the knee! Lock the knee! Lock the f***ing knee!" But she had a smile on her face and granted that's something you can only do at teacher training, it still made me smile.

All of the visiting teachers seem so giving and they are here to help us, and to keep learning more for themselves. It's pretty amazing really, they're not getting paid to be here, they have to take time away from their studios, and they do it because they love the yoga and they believe in the community. That's what it's all about. Last night, I was talking to my mom and she asked me if i regretted coming at all, and without a doubt or without a hesitation, my answer was no. When Bikram was talkign about Karma yoga, and Dharma, I fully believed in my heart I was following my Dharma. I truly feel like i am supposed to be a yoga instructor. (granted I need to figure out a sidejob to get a little health insurance still.... ) but anyways, even when I was giving my dialog, I was nervous, but only to an extent because I knew I was supposed to be doing it. I think I felt more excited that anything. I just keep thinking about how I'm really proud of myself. This is a pretty big commitment and a big sacrifice. I mean, I graduated from college, I have a degree, and I'm still following my heart and doing what I want to do. granted it's not easy, I had to take out my first loan, and jsut being here isn't easy, it's hard. But I'm doing it. And that makes me happy.